My Story - My Body

This weekend was perfect!

Sunshine, good friends, clients, parties on rooftop decks, watermelon water, lessons from the Universe and a wonderful photo sent to me this morning by a good friend to help cheer me up.

And now I need a day to just sit because so much happened in the last 48 hrs.  

One important lesson I learned this weekend was to check in with my body.  This sounds so simple but honestly. It's really not a simple thing for me.

Let me explain.

This weekend I met some new people.  I was having a great time getting to know them and I found myself telling funny stories about my love life.  But suddenly I started to noticed where I was feeling uncomfortable in my body and my spirit.  I was having fun but something felt off.   As we moved venues and kept hanging out someone asked me what I did for work.  I then started to tell them about Ritual Coaching and my practice.   All of a sudden the energy shifted.  I felt really comfortable.  I felt strong, beautiful and excited in a way that all afternoon I had not been feeling.   

I ran home to shower between parties and as I was walking down the hallway my guides pointed out to me -

Don't you feel the difference in how much better talking about your story felt than talking about Mr. Bigman's story?  It's time to stop hiding behind men and to really own your life.  It's time for you to shine and to notice what feels good and what does not feel good.   Only talk about what feels good.  Let go of what no longer feels good in your body.

And then I felt a rush of energy. Holy BATMAN! 

I can see how I did this with all my Ex's.  Their story became much more interesting in my life than my own story. So I would focus on them and give up on myself.   Every single time.

But as I was walking down the hallway I heard myself say this.

My story is interesting. 

It feels so good to finally embrace the fact that my story is interesting.  

This is very different than being a straight ego moment.  This is about the self love that I have been missing that is finally returning.  This is not to say I am the most interesting person in the world.  But this is to say that I am returning to myself and realizing how even in things as simple as friendly conversation, I am quick to give up on myself and deny my truth. 

Now comes the hard part.  Change.

I have a sadness today.  Because when I come to realize my story is more interesting than Mr. Bigman's story, I also realized I no longer want to be a part of his story.  I want my own story.  I want a man that is not tied up with an organization that rules his life.  I want a man that wants me for my story and wants to me meet me with his story.  

This sounds so cryptic I know.  But I can't really say much more than it.  His name is Mr. Bigman for a reason. 

So I have to integrate this lesson.  Let the feelings come up.  Let myself be sad about letting go of the old story while I call in my new story.  

Because my new story has me standing in my power and being surrounded by loving and wonderful people that love me for me.  

Venus Has Been Whispering To You. Have You Been Listening?

Venus has been coming to me the last two weeks and whispering lessons into my ear.  These have been uncomfortable and life changing.  Nothing dramatic or scary.  But they are big changes.   Venus has been gentle is showing me where I need to change.  Where my heart wants to grow and where I need to let go of my old story.  I love her for this.

On the eve of the new moon I slept for two hours.  But instead of being mad or grumpy at the lack of sleep, I am grateful.   Grateful for my peaceful home where I can listen to trains at night.   Grateful to feel the breeze coming up from the waterway between the lake and the sound.  Grateful for a large deck with a new canopy that allows me to be outside in a cozy space that I am building.  Grateful for a cold bath at 4 am with magical oils to soothe me.

This is where I honor Venus for whispering these lessons to me.  She has shown me lovingly where I can and need to change and that it is safe to make these changes.  It is safe to let go of the old and take that leap of faith.  I am so grateful that I can finally hear these messages and am ready to be guided by them.

I am also in full swing of meeting with my clients again.  It feels so good to be out of vacation mode and up and running in coaching mode.  I love all the changes my clients are working on.  I love the stories and images they send me.  And I love the fact we are not just connecting as people but we are connecting on a soul and energetic level. It makes my heart so very happy. I am learning as much from them as they are learning from me.

 

If Merlin Lived In Modern Times

I truly believe if Merlin lived in modern times he would work a normal 9 to 5 day job.   He would travel between the two worlds seamlessly.  He might even live in the suburbs.  He would infuse magic in everything he did but he would also realize that in order to live he needs to live with a foot in each world.   He would also do his work quietly.  He would change lives with everything he did but he would not make a show of it because at this point magic has such a odd place in our society.   We need to normalize it.  It isn't about material objects or success.  Magic is about inviting our spirits back into our lives and living in divine harmony.  It's about working with energy to experience what it is to be living at this time. It's about being human and magical all at once.

This is what I have been learning lately.   How to be magical while living a totally normal life.   I don't need to drop out of society.  I don't need to be famous.  What I need to do is to help people return to themselves and integrate magic back into their lives on a daily basis.  To let go of their old stories and to invite their spirit back in because our spirit is what we are all craving and missing.   And our spirit is what connects us to magic.

I am so in love with my spirit.  She has come back fully in the last few months and she is not leaving.  I have been spending my time getting to know her so that she will stay.  She is beautiful and fun and happy.   So happy!

New Moon

Since I started living my life by the moon cycles, magic is everywhere.  This new moon coming up on Sunday is a fertile new moon for growing your intention. It's earthy so I will be burying my intention in the dirt. It's in Taurus so connecting it with materials goods, career and success will give it an extra oomph.  But Taurus energy is also about strong commitment and loyalty so there is a connection to relationships and love. My favorite past partner was a Taurus. They have a sweet spot in my heart.

My intention will be about my company and the big dream that just appeared this week.  I can't talk about it yet until lawyers do their things and papers are signed.  So probably not until September. But I can talk about what I will be doing until then.

I will be setting the intention for what my vision is around this situation and then I will be letting go and trusting the right outcome will happen.
Yep.
 I will not be desperate or freaked out.  My energy will be confident and secure because I know the Universe is loving and magic is happening.   I know that I am doing my soul's work and I am being rewarded for it.  And I know that if it does not work out, I still have my company that I am building on my own. So I really am in the best position.

I am meeting with new clients daily and loving every moment of it. It fuels my heart and fills my soul to be able share with them with I have learned and created.  I get to build a vision for them while contributing to my vision.  I love hearing how their lives progress as they expand and grow into magic.  I love how each person is different and yet we are all human.